Kitty Bowling


My husband and I used to live in a tin can. Not literally of course. It was a small 1970’s style single wide mobile home with a flat metal roof. We affectionately called it our “love shack”.

At that time, we were also the proud parents of roughly twenty – yes, I said TWENTY cats!

OK, I know what you are thinking, “how irresponsible of you!“

The truth is that we were poor in those days and kitty birth control was NOT in our budget. This resulted in several generations of our cat children going forth and multiplying month after month. We had big cats, small cats, fat cats, skinny cats, cats that climbed on…well, just about every surface you can imagine.

We loved, fed and named them all. We were one big, happy feline family.

One night as we were laying in bed talking over the days events, we were suddenly startled by a strange, loud noise that started directly over our bedroom and ran the length of the trailer roof, fading out the further away it got.

“THR-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-UMPMEOW-W-W-W-w-w-w-w-w-w! V-E-R-R-ROMPA….OOMPA….OOPMA….OOPMA….oompa…oompa…oompa…MEOW-W-W-W-w-w-w-w-w-w! Thud“!

At first we thought it was thunder and that some of the cats got caught by surprise by an oncoming storm. But when it happened again half-a-dozen more times, we – analyzers that we are – began to theorize on what strange scenario could be playing itself out on our roof.

“Could two of the males be fighting over the same female?”

“Or…perhaps one of the males lured one of the females up on the roof for a little game of find-the-pussy?”

“Maybe they were all bored and decided to throw a group pussy party on the roof tonight under the moonlight and things just got out of control because someone had a little too much catnip?”

“No! No…..I’ve got it!”, my husband shouted, laughing himself silly.

“WHAT?” Between gasps for air he said, “They – are – BOWLING…you know, kitty bowling!”

We both collapsed into giggles as we pictured two or three of the older, bigger cats, each with his or her own custom kitten rolled up in a ball in their paws as they ran on tip toes up to the line and “tossed” their kitty baby balls onto the roof.

Each kitten then found themselves in their own personal groove on the aluminum roof, a few inches apart but moving in the same direction, rolling, rolling, rolling, head-over tail, the entire length of the house, until they smashed headlong into some of the medium sized volunteer cat “pins” that were lined up along the edge of the opposite end of the roof until…THUD! They all fell to the ground in a mangled, tangled feline heap.

We pictured a ladder at our end of the house, with a line forming as the kittens curiously climbed up to see what the big cats were doing up there. Sort of like the lines at the average amusement or water park for humans. Little did they know what wild adventure was about to unfold in their young kitty lives.

Oh now, don’t be so judgmental. You weren’t there, OK? If you had been there, you would have laughed yourself silly too! It was just one of the funniest feline fantasies we had had in a long time.

And laughter is good for the soul, OK?

Especially right before bedtime.

Disclaimer: None of the cats depicted in this story were permanently harmed or hurt in any way.

So get over your feline phobia self.


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